Episode 25

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Published on:

2nd May 2025

Episode 25 How to Advocate for Yourself as a Leader

As a female leader, knowing how to advocate for yourself is a game-changer. But let’s be real—doing it can feel awkward, uncomfortable, or even risky. In this e episode, Sarah dives into why self-advocacy is often difficult for women in leadership and shares practical steps to build your confidence, communicate your value, and ask for what you need to thrive. With reflections from her own leadership journey and client experiences, Sarah walks you through the mindset shifts and strategies to become your own best advocate—without feeling pushy or inauthentic. Whether you're feeling stuck, overlooked, or just want to lead with more purpose and presence, this episode will give you the tools to stand tall and speak up.

Show Notes

[00:00:00] Welcome to Unstuck and Unstoppable – Helping ambitious female leaders thrive with purpose

[00:01:00] Why self-advocacy matters and how it helps unlock your potential

[00:02:00] What is self-advocacy—and why is it so crucial for women in leadership?

[00:03:00] Sarah’s personal story of learning to self-advocate at Amnesty International

[00:04:00] Why it’s hard to advocate for yourself: stats, fears, and systemic barriers

[00:05:00] The inner rules and beliefs that hold us back (“I want doesn’t get”)

[00:06:00] A client story: when confidence in self-advocacy gets shaken by toxic leadership

[00:07:00] Step 1: Get clarity on what you want, need, and where you thrive

[00:08:00] Understanding your boundaries and available resources

[00:09:00] Step 2: Talk about your work and position your value

[00:10:00] How visibility of your contributions influence career opportunities

[00:11:00] Step 3: Know your worth and don't be afraid to ask for support

[00:12:00] Expect pushback: how resilience builds stronger self-advocacy

[00:13:00] Step 4: Advocate with others—collective action for greater change

[00:14:00] Step 5: Do the inner work—confidence, mindset, and belief in your value

[00:15:00] Why advocating for yourself benefits everyone, especially your team

[00:16:00] Quick recap + free resources and a reminder: you are unstoppable

Useful Links

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Join The Love What You Do Facebook Group

Connect with Sarah on LinkedIn

Rate & Review the Podcast

If you found this episode of Unstuck & Unstoppable helpful, please do rate and review it on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

If you're kind enough to leave a review, please do let Sarah know so she can say thank you. You can always reach her at: sarah@careertreecoaching.co.uk

Remember: Shine brightly. Lead boldly. Unlock the extraordinary potential within you. You are unstoppable. 💥

Transcript
Speaker:

Welcome to Unstuck and Unstoppable,

the podcast for ambitious female

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leaders who want to create more impact,

income, and influence in their careers.

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feel connected to their passion

and purpose, but without

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selling out or burning out.

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I'm Sarah Archer, a leadership coach

and career strategist, helping women

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like you thrive in leadership roles

while staying true to your values.

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I'm the founder of CareerTree

Coaching and have over 15 years of

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coaching experience and significant HR

leadership experience to share with you.

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I know as a female leader it can

be hard to find time to focus

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on your career aspirations.

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The day job can be all consuming.

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Plus, no matter how senior you are,

there are always going to be times

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when you feel stuck, when you have

self doubt, or feel like an imposter.

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And that's where unstuck

and unstoppable comes in.

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Each week I'll be sharing practical

strategies, insightful interviews and

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inspiring stories to help you boost

your confidence, lead with purpose

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and achieve sustainable success.

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If you're ready to stop playing

small and unlock the incredible

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potential you have within you and feel

unstoppable, you're in the right place.

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Let's get started.

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Welcome to episode 25.

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I'm really pleased that you're joining me.

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Today, we're going to talk about how

to advocate for yourself as a leader.

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We're gonna look at what it is

why is it hard, how to do it,

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and the benefits of doing it.

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What is self-advocacy?

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In the very basic sense, it's

being able to speak up for

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your own needs and interests.

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And it means taking a more proactive

role in making sure your actions align

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with your goals rather than being swept

along with the general flow of things.

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And to be honest, self-advocacy

and resilience are crucial

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skills for female leaders.

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I saw a post yesterday from Mary s the

England goalkeeper in the women's team,

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and she was posting about self-advocacy.

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, if we don't do it for ourselves, you

know who is going to do it for us?

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We have to be able to position ourselves,

talk about ourselves in a way that means

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that we get what we need and what we want.

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And so that's what we're

gonna talk about today.

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And when I was thinking about this, I

think I learned how to advocate for myself

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when I worked for amnesty International,

which is a campaigning organization.

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I was surrounded by people who

were really skilled advocates.

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'cause that's what they were paid to do.

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They were paid to be able to advocate

for people who couldn't advocate for

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themselves, and they were all skilled

at it, both in the external environment.

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Also in the internal environment,

and I was the HR manager there.

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I put it into the CEO.

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And I worked alongside other

C-suite leaders and managers.

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And I had to be able to advocate not

just for myself, but also for the

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HR function and in a sense for the

people that I was representing the

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employees and the management team.

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I had to learn quickly how to be

able to advocate effectively and.

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In a way, a great opportunity to

observe people who are really good at

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it to reflect on what I did and to get

clear about what I needed to advocate on

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effectively, which is obviously what we're

gonna talk about today is how you do that.

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But let's talk about why it's hard.

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'cause I have to say

I didn't find it easy.

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I'd never had to do that kind of

self-advocacy previously, but it was

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my first leadership role and I had to

step up and learn how to be an advocate.

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A recent survey by Indeed showed that only

43% of women, so fairly, chunky amount

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of women, but certainly below, 50%.

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So 43% of women feel they advocate

the right amount for themselves.

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So that means 57% don't, and they don't

because of anxiety, fear of retribution,

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fear of being labeled aggressive or

pushy being perceived negatively.

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It is hard for women, and often in,

in the workplace we can experience

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microaggressions, about , the

gender pay gap that exists.

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There's also, systemic barriers to

advancement that women experience,

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which all contribute to making it

harder for us to self-advocate.

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And then we've got.

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Some internal stuff as well

that we have to navigate.

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It can feel awkward and

uncomfortable to self-advocate.

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I was brought up with a rule, if you

like, and you might resonate with this,

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I want doesn't get, so being clear about

what you wanted, expressing what you

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wanted as a child was told if you do

that, you're not gonna get what you want.

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And those internal rules can.

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Trip us up and hold us

back later in life too.

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We have to get over

those internal barriers.

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And then we might also feel that there's

no point in speaking up because we don't

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see change happening in our organization,

or we don't see or we see other women

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doing it, but not making a difference.

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So we maybe feel like.

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What's the point in doing it?

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But I would say that, even if your

organization isn't an organization

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that's open to you being an advocate

for yourself, you have to start stepping

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into that person that you want to

be, because otherwise you take that

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non-self advocacy into your next role.

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So practicing our self-advocacy, even if

you're not getting the results you want.

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Puts you in a better place

to continue that journey of

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self-advocacy through your career.

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Let's think about how to do it.

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But before we do that, I wanna

tell you about a client that I've

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worked with because sometimes it can

be circumstantial as well, so she.

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Previously had been able to self-advocate

pretty well, and then in her role

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that she was in, she was working for

a female leader, which is interesting.

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Who, was very good at advocating for

herself, but put my client into a

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situation where she took the back seat

in the meetings that she was in.

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She wasn't enabled to lead

on particular projects.

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Her boss took the lead, took the

credit for the team, and, she

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felt her role wasn't clear either.

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And so she felt she lost

her confidence and lost her

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ability to be a self-advocate.

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And what we're doing now is we're working

on her strengths and, understanding

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the value she brings and some of the

things that I'm gonna talk to you about

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in terms of how you can self advocate.

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So notice that sometimes it can be the

environment that we're in that isn't

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conducive to us being self advocating

and that we have to be aware of that

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and have strategies to be able to

manage that if that is happening for us.

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The first thing, and I talk about this a

lot with my clients, is having clarity.

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. You have to understand your own

needs and your own wants because

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if you don't understand what they

are, how can you advocate for them?

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Knowing what you need in order to do

your job well, knowing what you want

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in terms of where you want to go

means that it's easier for people to

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understand what you want to do in terms

of your career advancement and your

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development, and they can better help you.

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It's also about getting clarity

about knowing where you thrive.

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Like the client I just mentioned, knowing

what the conditions are that enable you to

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be a good self-advocate is really helpful.

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So getting that clarity.

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Also, part of that is

understanding your boundaries.

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Knowing what you will say yes to, knowing

what you will say no to will help you.

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Advocate for what you need

in order to deliver your job.

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And knowing what the available

resources are will help you

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to advocate for what you need.

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Knowing what's possible can

help with those in a sense.

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Negotiating sometimes what you want

or what you need in your career or in

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your particular work for your team.

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The next thing to think about, is getting

used to talking about , what you do.

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And this plays into positioning

yourself for what you need as well,

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and it's advocating for your value.

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If you imagine you have two members

of staff and one of them you ask

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them how the project's going and they

go, yeah, it's going really well.

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We're on schedule.

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I had a few things to iron

out, but it's all happening.

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It's doing really well.

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You think.

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Great.

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Brilliant.

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Then you ask the other employee,

how's your project going?

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And they say, yeah, it's on track.

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But I've had to renegotiate

things with a client because

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I flagged an issue with them.

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I've had to manage resources because

we had somebody go on long-term

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sick or whatever it might have been.

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I've had to deal with this

particular challenge, and the

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way I've done that is X or y.

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You'll be thinking, great they've

really great problem solver.

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They've managed things really

well, and they're still on track.

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Then when it comes to promotion or

an opportunity you might think your

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second staff member is more ready

for that particular opportunity or

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challenge or project or promotion

because you think of them as being a

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skilled problem solver, a negotiator

of , strong client relationships.

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Whereas the other person in your

team, . You might think they're great

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at delivery, but you think they have

it easy because they never flag the

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complexity of what they're doing for you.

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They just deliver.

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And sad that it may be because those

two people, those two, staff members,

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are probably equally skilled because

employee one isn't articulating and

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advocating for themselves in terms

of, this is what I do, this is how

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I do it, this is how I add value.

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It's not seen.

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So part of being a self-advocate

and asking for what you need and

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what you want is also being able to

articulate the value that you bring.

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It's getting used to stepping

into your power and articulating

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the value you bring.

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And women definitely find that

harder to do because we just.

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Get on with stuff, don't we?

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We just deliver.

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We don't often spend time talking about

the way we do it, and particularly when

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you are working as a leader, you sometimes

think my boss, they're really busy.

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They don't want all this detail.

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But actually it can be helpful to your

boss to understand what's going on.

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It's getting that balance right.

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Then you want to think about being able

to know your worth, which is part of this.

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Self-advocacy and

communicating what you do.

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Understanding your strengths and

your contribution and knowing your

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value, and again, articulating that.

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So linking it with strengths,

and that's with my client.

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That's what we're working on at

the moment, is getting clear

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about strengths and the value that

she brings to the organization.

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And , being able to communicate

those similarly, communicating what

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you need to people who can help you.

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Not being afraid to ask for help when

you need to, when you need that.

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It's part of self-advocacy is not

going alone, but recognizing I need

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some help or support with this and

articulating and asking for that.

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And being prepared for

pushback because when we.

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Advocate for ourselves and ask

for what we need, what we want.

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People aren't always gonna say

yes, often you're gonna get a no.

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You're gonna get rejection.

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And it's being prepared for that

and building that resilience.

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As I mentioned before, self-advocacy

and resilience are two really

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key skills for female leaders.

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Being resilient to that pushback and

not letting it deflate you and think.

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I'm not gonna try again.

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Reflection is a superpower for leaders.

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When you have advocated for yourself,

when it's perhaps not gone well,

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it's taking that time to go, okay,

what did go well in that conversation?

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What didn't go well and what would

I do differently to get a different

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outcome is a great way of being able

to build resilience and also continue

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to advocate by not taking it personally.

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You can also think about collaborating

with other female leaders in your

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organization to advocate together

for what change you want, because

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there's obviously more power in doing

that as a collective, as a group.

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If you feel, you are on the senior

leadership team and maybe something like

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wellbeing isn't being prioritized enough,

coming together as a group to advocate

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for that for change can be more powerful.

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Or it could be something else, resource

allocation, whatever it might be.

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Doing it together can

actually affect more change.

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And then there's always the inner work,

which , I talk about a lot because

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the reason we might not advocate

often is, that fear of rejection,

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fear of retribution fear of being

labeled too aggressive, too bossy.

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All of those things.

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Can get in our way plus the

programming that we've had.

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Being able to practice positive self-talk.

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Tracking your achievements.

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Thinking about skills you want to improve

so you can boost your confidence and not

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being afraid to ask for help is going

to be helpful in terms of advocating

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for yourself because your confidence

has got to be in the right space.

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For you to be able to self-advocate

and they are a symbiotic relationship.

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The confident you feel, the more

likely you are to self-advocate.

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The more you self-advocate,

the more confidence you feel.

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They do support one another.

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It's taking small steps if

you feel I'm quite far away

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from being able to confidently

advocate for myself at the moment.

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And of course, as always, if you feel

you want some coaching or some support

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with this, then do obviously message

me and we can have a conversation about

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your particular situation and what you

might need to put into practice to get

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to the point where you are confidently

self advocating for what you need.

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Why do this?

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What are the benefits of

advocating for yourself?

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Obviously in the long run, it means you're

better equipped to deal with difficult

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situations 'cause you've built that

resilience and you're clear about asking

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for what you want and what you need.

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You're gonna feel empowered

by, standing up for yourself

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and advocating for yourself.

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And again, that's going to give

you greater self-confidence.

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And as we talked about, those

things support one another.

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It's gonna enable you to become

more open and transparent about

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what you need, what you want.

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And that's obviously gonna help

in terms of people being able to

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support you in your career growth

because they're clear about what

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you are looking for, what you need.

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It's going to improve your communication

skills if you can be, open about where

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you are, what you need, what's going on,

what you're doing, et cetera, et cetera.

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And it's gonna help you to be a better

leader , because you can encourage your

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team and you can enable them and empower

them to also become self advocating, which

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again, improves performance of the team.

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A very quick recap of how to do it.

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Key is getting clarity, what you

want, what you need, what enables you

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to thrive, what your boundaries are.

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Get used to talking about you,

what you do, how you do it.

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Know your own worth.

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Collaborate where possible

with other female leaders.

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Don't be afraid to ask for

help and do that inner work.

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That means you can build your confidence

in order to advocate well for yourself.

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Do let me know how it goes.

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If you've got any success

stories, please do share them.

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If you've got other tips that you feel

would be useful in terms of advocating

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for yourself, then please do share them.

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Thank you so much for listening

to this episode of the Unstuck

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and Unstoppable podcast.

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I have lots of free resources you

can access on my website, ww.career

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tree coaching.co

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uk, and I'll also put

links in the show notes.

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If you found this episode

helpful, then please subscribe

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so you don't miss the next one.

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And please do share it with a

friend and leave me a review

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and I will personally thank you.

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Remember, you're capable of

more than shine brightly.

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Lead boldly and unlock the

extraordinary potential within you.

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Be unstoppable.

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About the Podcast

Unstuck & Unstoppable
Career Talk For Ambitious Women
Unstuck & Unstoppable is the go-to podcast for ambitious female leaders ready to amplify their impact, boost their income, and achieve career success on their own terms—without burning out or compromising their values. Hosted by Sarah Archer, a leadership coach and career strategist dedicated to empowering women in leadership, this show provides the tools, strategies, and inspiration you need to thrive in your career.
Whether you’re looking to overcome imposter syndrome, enhance your leadership skills, or create a sustainable path to success, each episode will offer actionable insights, expert interviews, and real-life stories to help you take your career to the next level.
It’s time to stop playing small, unlock your full potential, and create the impact you’re destined for. Tune in weekly to discover how you can lead boldly, live fully, and succeed with confidence and integrity.

About your host

Profile picture for Sarah Archer

Sarah Archer